Part 2: The Second Gift

I was a colicky baby I've been told. I used to cry inordinately as an infant. My mother says I had a chronic upset stomach. One fine day, my Grandma Ada was all set to take me to the hospital after several hours of crying. When she got me into the car and began the trip, I finally found restful sleep to the rhythm and temperature of the car engine.

As I grew into childhood, I was strong like my Dad. The only problem was that I kept getting sick. Lot's of colds, flues and other ailments. Once when I was about 9 or so, I was out playing with some friends in a corn field in Fairfield, Ohio. I hadn't been out there too long when my eyes began to itch with the kind of itch that doesn't go away but just gets worse the more you rub. Soon the itch began to move down into my lungs. It changed from being an itch at that point and began to transform itself into a vice. The normal airflow that one takes for granted, begins to require great exertion for a person like me. I could hear my lungs whistling at that point, an ugly tune with no discernible melody. I couldn't expand my chest cavity to full capacity. A full breath wasn't possible and it was hard to push out what little air I could take in. I made it home to an alarmed mother. By the time I reached her, I could barely see. The bags under bloodshot eyes were filled to brimming. They were virtually swollen shut.

This didn't stop me at the time from pursuing my dreams. As I said before, dreams are powerful things. They take hold of the imagination and emblazon themselves upon your mind and heart. Soon I began along with my parents down the road of visiting many medical experts to see if they could improve my symptoms if not my condition itself. Asthma and allergies are treatable conditions or so they seemed. But the truth is that they are not the only complications that have vexed me. For years I have suffered from chronic fatigue, food intolerances and other things. I have never found a doctor yet who understood the symptoms I have described to them. That was part of the test for me. Life would have been much easier to deal with if all my symptoms were easily attributed to some known condition. Instead I have dealt with mystery illnesses with no answers. This was especially hard for me while I was growing up. Many times I didn't look sick on the outside. I wished that I had some broken bone that was visible so that people would know I wasn't faking.


Here are a couple of pictures of me during my early dreaming years:

The picture on the left was when I was first starting out with my big dreams. I was nine years old and it was my first year of tackle football.

The picture on the right was when I was about 14 years old. I was a champion wrestler for my team. I only lost once that year and I was able to avenge the loss against that opponent later in a subsequent match. Both pictures were taken in Fairfield, Ohio.

I don't look sick in these pictures and I wasn't all the time, but the older I got, the sicker I got.

By the time I got to 10th grade we had moved from Ohio to Atlanta, GA. My asthma and allergy problems got so bad there that I came to a point where I could no longer successfully compete. I decided to retire from sports after that sophomore year, a decision that caused me considerable mental and emotional anguish. That pain was heightened by the fact that I didn't look sick to my coaches or my peers. They now thought of me as a "quitter", a "could have been", titles that in no way represented the true me.

I could never explain how this trial affected me on so many levels. It still affects me to this day. I still have my limitations, though thankfully I don't have the same pressure to win at all costs like I did when I was growing up.

I can tell you that I spent many hours consulting with God about the issue. As you might guess, I used many arguments and proposed many deals and contracts to have these health issues removed from me. I did my best to try to change God's mind. It reminds me of the scripture in 2 Corinthians 12: 7-8. It has become precious to me.

"And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.

For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me."

Like Paul I was answered through blessings and the promptings of the Holy Ghost.

"My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness."

Only recently in my forties have I begun to feel the rest of the sentiment that Paul expressed.

"Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."

Paul goes on to say, "Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong."

I have also come to love a new scripture that I discovered recently that helps a dreamer on his way.

"He which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully." 2 Corinthians 9: 6

We may not be able to reach all of our childhood dreams in this life. Every crop we plant doesn't always flourish. However, I know this, the more you try, the more you gain. We can sow and reap bountifully in all areas of our lives and of course, the greatest gift I mentioned is still available to all, the gift of eternal life.

Please join me in pursuing that dream which transcends all other dreams.